Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I can count

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

I have a "fat pussy" and I'm super self cautions about it. Do guys think it's gross?

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗ NEW WOMAN - analysis ˗ˋˏ ♡ ˎˊ˗

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t buy bullshit

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

What is the estimated number of people with an extra X chromosome?

I understand how hurricane paths work

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

What's the most trivial thing that ever made you go to the doctor?

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

Why do many men like women's breasts?

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

Gun owners, imagine if an attacker comes to your home and takes your gun to use against you before you had the chance to pick it up. Would you regret owning a gun?

I actually pay taxes

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

How do you confront your own family for not inviting you or leaving you out of things?

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

Can you explain the difference between “mi piace” and “mi piacciono” in Italian?

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

How are max different from medical and minimum security prisons?

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

I can read

Do married men know when their wives are having affairs?

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Has anyone ever worn leather pants? Are they comfortable?

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

I don’t cotton to rapists

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

What are some tips for making your husband fall madly in love with you again after going through the worst phase of your marriage?

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

Has anyone who has been a victim of a narcissist made contact with the other victims of the narcissist? Did it help to confirm what you suspected about the narcissists?

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I have complete contempt for fakery

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I see through liars

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I have a reading level above third grade

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”